Adri Audrey Bean Boonie Brandon Cheng Cheryl David Eve Holly Kwanie Lynn Mark C Mark Marvin Minlin Pat Pris Ronald Ruishan Sam Sarah Shiping Simin Sphire Tricia Wei
Saturday, July 20, 2002 02:45 p.m. Really feel like giving up at times. I must be pretty stupid, because although I know I'm not downright stupid, I refuse to proof so. Ultimately, I'm stupid. Did that make sense? But, since this is not some pity party, I won't whine my insecurities to you. I won't rant on anymore, because I'll just continue to give myself excuses. Meaningless. Well, oral was pretty good today. I did what I do best, that is, to talk a whole load of bull. Verbal diarrhea, as usual. Well. Was asked about stress in school, and whether students are able to cope with it. I said it truly depends on the individual- whether she prioritises her time, etc, whereas students who are unable to cope with stress, merely escape, choosing the easier way out. Haha. Now you know why I could speak with so much ease when I said that. Tres drole.
Friday, July 19, 2002 11:55 p.m. I think we spoil ourselves too much. :) YUUUM! Anyway. Oral tomorrow. Whoopeedo.
Thursday, July 18, 2002 10:58 p.m. This is to inform everyone that, my email (veil@geekstar) is no longer in use and, my ICQ is currently suffering from extreme moodswings. If I should be found suddenly disappearing from ICQ, it's really just my computer screwing up. Just as well, I suppose. Must slowly rid myself of all distractions. Hmm.
Wednesday, July 17, 2002 08:20 p.m. I've not a single cent left in my wallet. And I'm having instant noodles for dinner. I don't feel very positive about this..
Sunday, July 14, 2002 10:02 p.m. Today I felt like I was out with a famous celeb. Mwaahaha. Just joking sweety ;) Well anyway, I had such a superduperooper day. I'm always filled with so much dread on Sunday nights though; the weekends are much too short! Drinking lots and lots of water now. Hate having a dry throat...
Sunday, July 14, 2002 12:04 a.m. I have the DBS ad song, Life is Beautiful on repeat mode right now. I know many people have said this, yet I really can't help but exclaim how much I love the advert. The lyrics, the music, the sweet young bride, in her immaculate, pristine gown- twirling, laughing, exuding radiance, joy. Life is beaautiiful.
Hmm, new photos are up. Enjoy. Life IS beautiful, if only you would open your eyes, awake your senses, and stop to feel. (sleep time, hurrah)
Friday, July 12, 2002 11:19 p.m. Don't know where/how/what to start with. It's one of those weeks when all it's events, both bitter and sweet, can be summed up with one long sigh. A very long, undefined sigh; consisting of various conflicting emotions. In many ways, I feel like such a let down, not only to my parents, but also to myself. I know there's a slight danger in proclaiming this, because really, I've only myself to blame. Self pity and (fake) apathy is too damn easy, I realize. Easy, but pointless. However, all's not doom and gloom, of course. Afternoons like these make up for most of it. Sweet. On a totally different note, I really ought to get my eyes checked. As of late, my vision has become all blurry and furthermore, my eyes become terribly dry and uncomfortable during the late evenings. Highly irritating.
Wednesday, July 10, 2002 09:05 p.m. Observing different cultures and lifestyles, there's nothing more interesting than that. I've always envied travel reporters on TV for the very reason that they get to travel, eat, shop all FOC. (Well, mostly, anyway.) It seemed like only a week ago that I was there, eating my dimsums and tang yuans. Food, shopping, but most of all the feel of being in a foreign land. The stark contrast of modern skyscrappers and the dilapidated pigeon-hole flats just across the streets never ceases to amaze me. Such amazement is inexplicable, at least in my limited vocabulary. Just standing there, fumbling with road maps and travel guides, amidst a sea of strangers speaking in my native dialect, part of me feels so alienated, yet the other feels so at home. The neon billboards and lights that hang overhead on old buildings brings so much life to the otherwise dark and squalid streets. If I was a painter or a poet, I would illustrate these vivid images in my mind for you. But because I am neither, I can only describe them in shallow, boring terms. And the feeling of returning home, returning to you..... well, nothing quite beats that! ;)
Saturday, July 6, 2002 01:31 p.m. There's nothing like waking up to the music of the Bee Gees. YES, I just got up, my head still throbbing a little, probably because I slept 3 times longer than I usually do on school days. We're talking about 12 hours here. :) Fantastic, isn't it? Now, if I can just reconcile myself back to the books again. Woe is me!
Friday, July 5, 2002 03:56 p.m. Jhumpa Lahiri's short stories are so engaging. The Interpreter of Maladies is definitely a must read. It didn't matter that the bus was packed, as it always was during this time of the day, and that the afternoon's hot sun seemed to sap all energy from the perspiring, languish bodies in it. I had my book, on my lap, and with that, nothing else seemed to matter. As if the lives that revolved around it's varied characters seemed more real than what was before me. Well, At least for that short 20 minutes or so. After reading a story, I would lift my eyes from it's yellowed pages, musing over it's unexpected twist, it's ironic, bittersweet ending. During which, I happened to notice an elderly Indian lady, dressed in a purple Sari, her hair weaved together in a long braid that reached down to her waist. Charmingly odd, because as you might know, Jhumpa Lahiri's stories tell the lives of Indians and it seemed so apt then and there. In fact, I was so strangely inspired that I decided to have Indian rice cakes with curry for lunch. Perfect! :)
Thursday, July 4, 2002 11:54 p.m. If you actually saw what I typed earlier on this evening, good for you. If you didn't, even better. Well, at least this humourous incident has taught us one thing- never leave anonymous comments. :) I associated all these anonymous comments in my guestbook as one entity, perhaps this was why, half amused, half bewildered, I began ranting on endlessly, whilst sporadically spouting out various not-so-nice adjectives. Looks like, ultimately, I'm the loser, hahaha. Life is so amusing, especially when you end up being the butt of your own jokes! :) Actually, to be entirely honest, I had learnt those insults of a page I happened to surf upon. I suddenly became queen of insults, able to snipe anyone with a sharp tongue (how powerful it felt, if only for that short a while), but with the help of the website, because, the truth is, I'm just a mere simpleton without it. Simpleton, yes I got that off that site too. HAHAHA. Oh well, a writer shouldn't reveal her methods, even if they're seemingly underhand. Hahaha. Oh, and Dr Kway Png, I should hire you to be my psychiatrist instead. How much do you charge? Make it quick, before I lose my ignorant, feeble, decadent mind. Did I miss out any insulting adjectives? I rule, like, totally!
Tuesday, July 2, 2002 7:15 p.m. Just got home. I was feeling a little irritated, after previously being ignored on purpose by a bus driver. It was pretty obvious that I was running to catch the bus, but he pretended to be totally oblivious to me. How irritating is that! Decided to take a stroll along the shops, browsing through anything that might interest me to pass time. However, my attention soon diverted to a blind man singing. How uncanny. "whenever i want you, all i have to do is dream." Especially so when he goes, "dreeeaaaaaam".
Am half-typing, half-watching "My Sassy Girl". I remember watching it, all teary eyed, during my flight to Hong Kong. There's something so endearing about that movie, something so intangible, so bittersweet. There's nothing exceptionally special about the characters in it, but somehow, the myraid of emotions it evokes is enough to mesmerize. Another movie to re-watch would be The Virgin Suicides. Thanks for the VCD Sam. :) Can hardly wait to watch it. I remember feeling pretty traumatized (in exaggeration, really) after I watched it with Pris. Before the movie, we were counting the number of couples in the theatre- it was record high.
Saturday, June 29, 2002 11:43 p.m.
Last night was so amazing that I wished I had brought my camera to at least encapsulate some of it's beauty. Yet, photographs alone can never come close to expressing such profoundly simple emotions. Although I
eased into bed soon after I got home, I drifted into balmy sleep, a smile across my face.
Early this afternoon, Shiping, Boonie and I met up to look for our gowns. What a tedious process this has become! I never did expect it to be this difficult! The gowns that I adored were either, too dark in colour (my school only allows pastels), too revealing, or both. I want something that falls nicely on me- but, I'm terribly picky and nothing seems to fit into the "perfect gown" category, although I don't even know what criterias I have for that! And yes, my school does have inane rules regarding our prom gowns, expect, perhaps for the fact that we're supposed to appear all chaste and impeccable in pastels. But, then again, I shouldn't complain, because the girls before us has to dress in white. Ugh.
Towards the late afternoon, I took a cab down to Gardens for YF. There was this girl, who's testimony really striked me. She's a brave girl, much more than I am, and it's just spectacular how God works in people's lives. Anyhow, I took off early after YF because the pseudo soccer fan that I am wanted to go down to the club to catch the 3rd placing match. All I have to say is- WHAT A MATCH! Korea had fairly good chances to score, but, alas, they were all off target. I must admit though, the boys played hard and well, and I admire them for it, no matter what you harsh critics say. But ultimately, the Turks were pretty skillful and you just had to give it to them. I tell you, my heart sank when the match ended. It was such a touching moment when, as the fans continued cheering, the players locked arms and embraced each other. Soccer is fascinating, if not for the skill it takes, then for the beauty of the game.
Friday, June 28, 2002 12:53 a.m. All of a sudden, I am transformed into a nocturnal being, an unusual display of vigilance. The dead of the night, now my sole acquaintance. The coffee powder that my father bought from Germany has been decreasing in great amounts. Sleeping for just 4 hours each night can't be a good thing, you say. Honestly, I really am quite glad that the school week is coming to an end. Amazingly enough, I've survived the first week of school without getting into any trouble. (regarding unfinished homework, ahem.) Two tests this morning, and I'm doomed to flunk the A Math one. I'm a born genius.
There is something palpably obscure about tonight that makes me desire to see the world through the eyes of a poet. I really ought to make up for what I've deprived myself of recently- sleep. The lack of it makes me feel somewhat odd, and yes, on the verge of hallucinating. (seriously, I thought I saw a phantom figure lurking in the opposite appartment. but alas, an hour later, and it remained unmoved. my eyes were playing tricks on me. or was it my mind?) Well, a little prayer, and I'm off to sweet, sweet slumber.
Tuesday, June 25, 2002 04:24 p.m. Been ordering the exact same ice-creams and pastas for the last 2 weeks. We're fanatics! We were down at Häagen-Dazs and Pastamania (again) last night. It was One Perfect Moment again, baby ;) Heh, heh. Anyway, I've uploaded the photos up at my new site. Gonna use that site as a photo-journal. Thanks again, Sphire! This super nice guy emailed me to offer a space at his domain. Check out his site- nice music. :)
Oh yes, I hate school. I hate waking up early in the morning, dragging my body from the warmth of my bed. And I hate the lessons in class that seem to go on for what seems like eternity. I miss the holidays. :( I'm feeling so upset and exhausted right now. Ha.
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